Why victim thinking causes you to lose in life

Are you a victim?  Victim of what you may ask?  What I mean is a victim in the way you think.  This mindset will cause you to lose in life.

Victim thinking consists of complaining about your woes or blaming others for your situation, or coming up with a million reasons not to do something.

Victim thinking will rob you of hope, empowerment, and prosperity.

Basically, you give up power to control your life and allow outside influences to be in charge .

Victim thinking makes you miserable and it shows.  I for one cannot stand being around a negative person; it’s sucks the life out of me.  So if you want to complain about your woes to me, forget about, I don’t want to hear it unless you are asking me for help.

Don’t get me wrong, there are events that happen in our lives that we can’t control.  BUT, how you respond to these occurrences determine your success in life.

One of my all-time favorite books is called, ” The Question Behind the Question (QBQ),” by John G. Miller. The book’s main theme is practicing personal accountability at work and in life.  It talks about what to really ask yourself to eliminate blame, complaining, and procrastination.  Whenever I feel that I am starting to get into the complaint mode, I pick up this book to get me back on track.  Very short read.

Victim thinking will prevent you from being happy in your vocation.  If you complain about your boss and your coworkers and so on, then leave, why would you want to stay if your job is that bad?  Security?  A so-called pension?  Job security is a myth. Your security in the market place depends on you and your ability to adapt.  Plus, this is unfair to the people you are complaining about (gossip).

Victim thinking is a barrier for change.  Look around you, technology, the economy, and the workforce are changing rapidly.  I work as a Healthcare Leader in my day job; with Health Reform (Obama care) being implemented as we speak, many changes are happening that are turning this field upside down.  I could choose to complain, belly ache, and moan, or adapt and find ways to make it work.

If you are a Christian, you are called to become more “Christ-Like.”  Do you think Jesus was a complainer?  Can you imagine him hanging out with his disciples griping about the Pharisees or the Roman Empire?

In personal finance, this type of thinking limits your decision-making.  In today’s economic environment, you hear people say, “I am not doing well because of the economy.” Or, “the economy is Obama or Bush’s fault.”  Yes, the economy sucks now, but don’t let it hold you hostage.  A politician isn’t going to fix your life, you have that ability.

Question: Are you a victim thinker or complainer? Why is that?  If so, have you thought of ways to combat this?  Please share.

#ccc; padding: 3px; text-align: center;" action="http://feedburner.google.com/fb/a/mailverify" method="post" target="popupwindow" onsubmit="window.open('http://feedburner.google.com/fb/a/mailverify?uri=FromTheDeskOfRobertJacobs', 'popupwindow', 'scrollbars=yes,width=550,height=520');return true">Enter your email address:Delivered by FeedBurner
  • Rosemary

    I think I will have to pick up a copy of your book.

  • http://www.robertjacobs.org/ Robert Jacobs

    You can finish the book within an hour.