3 Tips on How to Get Your Free Spirit Spouse Onboard With a Financial Plan

Do you fight about money with your spouse? Is your spouse a free spirit where math and budgets don’t resonate with him or her? Do you need help on how to get him or her onboard with your financial plan?

photo credit: Anua22a via photopin cc

photo credit: Anua22a via photopin cc

Consequences of not being on the same page

Financial problems are a leading cause of divorce. It’s not the problems itself, it’s a couple’s inability to work together that leads to the breakup.

Marriage is a partnership. There must be respect for one another’s views or else the marriage deteriorates. Money issues are just the symptom.

One spouse is usually the uptight numbers person, on time for everything, and follows rules. The other spouse may seem irresponsible but really they are not (maybe), they just don’t like to be controlled and like to have freedom to do what they want.

This conflict can cause the financial issues. One saves and one spends and the other hand doesn’t know what the other is doing.

In some cases, the uptight spouse (nerd) has a financial plan but can’t seem to get the other spouse to follow it. So how can the “nerd” get the “free spirit” on a financial plan and build wealth?


The nerd must use tact and finesse to get the free spirit spouse on board. Or in other words, smooth talking. However, the smooth talking doesn’t have to be fake, it can have substance and meaning behind it.

Hera are three tips or suggestions for getting the free spirit on board with your financial plan:

  1. Goals: Start with the why. You both want the best in life. So dream to together. Where do you both want to be financially in 5, 10, or 20 years. If you both want to be wealthy or at be on solid financial footing, this is a step in the right direction. It’s hard to argue with wanting to win with money unless one of you just wants to be poor.
  2. Plan: Lay out the plan for this is the how, but don’t forget that why must lead the how. If your free spirit understands the goals for both of you, the how, or the plan, is not as hard to sell.
  3. Budget Together: Create your cash flow plan together. The nerd can create the budget and the free spirit gets the right to change the budget. An alternative to this is for each of you create budgets for the categories that are near and dear to both of you. Once you put those together, compromise to make that budget zero based (income minus expenses=0).

Including the spouse in the financial decision process is key. If a free spirit feels that he or she has input and has the power to make decisions, then it is much easier to on the same page with a financial plan.

Question: Do you develop a budget together with your spouse?